Driving Up the Mountain

I was a chaplain with an infantry battalion that was conducting field exercises in Yakima, Washington. While visiting our soldiers at remote locations, I asked my Chaplain Assistant if he would go up and over the mountain instead of taking the road around it. He agreed, but soon stopped and said he couldn’t go further because it was too steep. I told him the Hummer was built for steep inclines and asked him to proceed.

That’s when he said, “Chaplain, I’m not stopping because the vehicle can’t make it. I’m stopping because it’s too scary. I don’t want to drive up this mountain!”

“I understand. Let’s trade places and I’ll drive.”

Being a good, responsible NCO, he insisted that I show him my military driving license. And I did.

Driving up that mountain was so much fun. We got to the top, got out, and looked around. We could see for miles in each direction. Coming back down was even scarier because it seemed we were looking straight down. It was exhilarating. We were now ready to go and visit our Soldiers.

Words Can Inspire or Deflate

It’s important that husband and wife talk together regularly. That’s how you grow a good relationship. But how you talk to each other will make or break your marriage, because words are powerful.

Too often, people are careless with their words, giving no thought to what they’re doing to their mate. Or worse, some are intentionally cruel with their words, actually trying to hurt, damage, or destroy the one they’re supposed to love.

Words can inspire or deflate the person you’re talking with. Imagine the impact of hearing your husband or wife telling you every day, “You are wonderful. You’re good-looking. You’re smart. You can do anything you put your mind to.” Now, imagine what happens if instead, what you hear every day is, “You’re dumb. You’ll never amount to much. You can’t do anything right.”

When our kids were young, we started telling them, “You are talented and creative.” I don’t know how many zillion times they heard it, but we told them pretty often. I’m pretty sure they believed it then, and I think they still do. There’s a certain sense of people becoming what they believe. Therefore, it’s important that we give the right messages.

Words Have the Power of Life and Death

Words can kill or heal. Every time you insult, name-call, or say something derogatory to your partner, you are bringing illness or death. It’s like your words are a thermostat or volume control. By speaking positives, encouragement, and inspiration, you’re turning up hope, confidence, health, and life. But by speaking negatives, discouragement, and insults, you’re turning up despair, stress, sickness, and death.

The ramifications are far-reaching, impacting your partner’s health, self-confidence, and other relationships. It can affect performance in any area of life: work or school, athletics, driving, or sex. If you’re on the same team, you want your teammate to be as healthy as possible. So, you don’t speak in ways that lead to sickness and death. Instead, you are careful to promote life, health, and joy. And you do that with your words.

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